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Thursday, September 3, 2009

My Epiphany

Thursday, August 03, 2006
My epiphany
I have been an Empath as long as I can remember. I have pick up on certain aspects of people's lives. It takes me some time to do that amd it's usually after a few conversations. This was especially stong duting pregnancies. I could actually find things that people had lost during those 9 months.

I can't predict things like lotto numbers (don't I wish), or when the next disaster will happen. But it's PEOPLE that I am intuitive to. And it's usually not strangers. I can tell when something not right is going on in my daughter's lives, and I try my best not to pry, just hope they have enough faith in me to confide.

A young lady very dear to me had just met a family member of my son-in-law and I noted to my daughter that there was something going on. There were "sparks" between these two and I could tell they belonged together. And, Goddess willing, they are together as a couple for many years to come.

A couple of months ago, I met someone who has had a very strange effect on me. Since meeting her, my physical health has plummeted and I feel extremely emotionally fragile. I have not slept but one full night in the past 5 weeks. I have resorted to taking sleeping pills to help me sleep, but with no relief. I still wake up in the middle of the night.

I can tell when she is telling me her version of the truth and when she is lying. I can "see" the disturbances in her past and can see the reason she is a very cold woman.

And I realized about a half hour ago that she is an Energy Vampire. I have only met one other in the past, and did not recognize it until after she was out of my life, and even then, I did not recognize her for what she was.

I am not blaming her for my actual physical woes. She did not cause them. But I feel that she is the underlying cause for other symptoms I am having. The simple fact is that she has sucked all positivity from me

She relies on me for things right now, and as of tomorrow evening , she will no longer be dependant on me for anything. I can no longer allow myself to be used like this.

I will surround myself with a shield of positive light. I will make a conscious effort to breathe deeply and let those negative forces leave my mind and body I will cut her away from me. I will put a sign on my door that says "Leave your drama outside this home"

I can't do this any longer and will no longer allow anyone's negative energy to have such an impact on my life.

The Pagan part of me believes this. The part of me that wants to help people will have to step back a bit. I will continue doing my volunteer work because I get good feelings, good energy from knowing that I am doing my part to help others who have experienced Domestic Violence.

But if I do pick up on these Energy Vampires, I will no longer allow them to enter my life and have control over me.

I am empowered now by this realization. I feel better about my life and my future. My Goddess will guide me and I have Faith that she is with me and will allow me to continue to be Empathetic with others, but I vow I will focus on those who I feel the positive energies radiate from them.

Surrounded by the strength of light. Filled with the breath of life. I am 51. The next 30 or so years of my life will pass by more quickly than the last 30. And I fully intend to bring the good in and not allow the bad to overtake me.

Brightest of Blessing. My Circle is closed

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